"I Get Along with Boys Better"
- Macy McFerren
- Aug 7, 2023
- 3 min read
Guy friends are good, female friends are great. It's okay to be a girls girl!
Growing up, I was always a tomboy. I had the short pixie cut, wasn't into fashion, and didn't mind getting muddy. I never grew out of that tomboy behavior, but it did mature as I did. I never cared for the frills and the pink. In my head, this separated me from the entire female population. I wanted to mainly hang out with guys. They just understood that I didn't care about all the girly stuff. In college, I had two main female friends, my sister, and a ton of guy friends. I felt like I connected better with them than I did females. The phrase, "I get along with boys better" was all too familiar to me.
For some girls, that mindset doesn't change and that is okay, but for me it did. After I put my prejudices aside, I was able to see that I wasn't the only girl who didn't care for traditionally girly things. There were other girls out there with similar interests to me. Since finding amazing and strong females friends, I've realized there are several benefits to good female companionship. That is what this week's blog is about.
Understanding
Within female friendships, there is an understanding that you can't find with a male friend. Biologically, females' brains are wired different from mens'. I have heard it said that women are spaghetti and men are waffles. In other words, women can think about and do more than one thing at a time. We are natural multitaskers. This means like we carry our emotions throughout the entire day and we can't typically push them aside for long. Men, however, can only focus on or do one thing at a time. They can compartmentalize a lot better than we can. Just this difference alone separates us from men and can lead to a lack of clear understanding in how we deal with certain things. Emotions are a big one. Women, as a general rule, have a tougher time separating their feelings from events and people than men do. Have you ever realized that women will hold onto grudges with their friends but men barely need to apologize? Or have you held onto anxiety all day only to notice that your male friends or partner were able to forget about it?
Females understand the way each others' minds work. When we come to each other needing support, its oftentimes going to be more relevant to the feelings at hand. This understanding can lead to more open conversations. There is a level of trust established when we know our friend will understand the way our mind is working and we won't be judged for expressing our emotions.
Sisterhood
I have a twin sister, Mads. I adore her and I love her with everything in me. I tell her when something good happens, and I run to her when something bad happens. She understands me. This is because we're family, but I've also experienced this sisterhood with my best friend, Sydney. Sydney started off as my roommate but she quickly became my absolute best friend. We are very different, but come from similar backgrounds and we hold similar values. I go to her with everything that I go to Mads with because we have that bond. She is my emotional support, much like my actual blood sister.
Some can argue that boyfriends and husbands can be this kind of support as well. Maybe. I'd argue that it is entirely different though. Male partners are there to protect and guide. Sisters are meant to nurture and love on. Sometimes, you just need girl advice as well. It could be something as foolish as how to style your hair that day, or it could be more serious, like parenting advice or relationship advice. Female friends are platonic life partners. They help you navigate growing up and getting old.
After 20 years of being friends with only guys I can confidently sit here and tell y'all that I have never laughed harder and more genuinely than I have with my girl friends. We have inside jokes that make me cry laughing until my stomach hurts. We understand the looks we give to each other (ladies, you know what I mean). I have never found a home faster than I have with them. Since being away from Madison, I realized that female friendship was always important in my life but it was never a hole that I had to fill, until this summer. Boys are fun and they can add flavor and spice to every day, but girl friends can be the foundation of a healthy and happy life.
It is okay to be a girls girl!
Comentários